When I Failed to Reflect Christ
Scripture: “For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.” — Romans 7:19
The Story
Today, I did something I never thought was in me. A young lady approached my car, and instead of being open and kind, I immediately became defensive. In the city, you learn to guard yourself, to assume someone wants something from you. And I let that habit rise up.
I was rude. I cut her off in my tone before I even knew her heart. My first thought was that she was going to ask for something. I allowed my flesh, my “always defensive self,” to come forward instead of the ambassador for Christ that I say I am.
But the only thing she asked about—after I finally rolled down my window—was the QR codes on my vehicle. She was curious about what I was sharing. And in that moment, I didn’t respond with the joy of the Gospel. I dismissed it. I said it wasn’t a business, just a blog about “God stuff.” My words were cold and without reverence.
The Struggle
As I drove home, I cried. I pictured the Father looking down, saddened by my actions, and Jesus still interceding for me, whispering, “She is Mine. She’s only human.”
I wept for two reasons:
Because I knew I had misrepresented Christ in that moment.
Because I had possibly missed an opportunity to draw someone closer to Him.
I thought about Peter, who denied Jesus three times. In that moment, I tasted a small glimpse of his sorrow—the weight of knowing I failed the very One I love.
The Scripture
Romans 7 came to life in me today: “It is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me… for I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.”
Like Paul, I didn’t want to act that way. Yet my actions betrayed my intentions. And like Peter, I know that failure is not the end. Jesus restored Peter, and He restores us too.
The Surrender
I asked the Lord to forgive me. I prayed for that young lady—that her curiosity about Christ would not be diminished because of my weakness. I released my tears as an offering of repentance.
And here’s the hope: God’s grace covers even this. My mistake does not disqualify me from being His ambassador. Instead, it reminds me that I need Him desperately.
The Lesson
Being an ambassador for Christ doesn’t mean I’ll never stumble. It means that even when I do, I run back to Him, receive His forgiveness, and allow Him to use even my failure as a testimony.
Perhaps the next time someone approaches me, my heart will be softer, my ears will be quicker to hear, and my mouth slower to speak.
His mercies are new every morning. And so, I rise again.
Prayer:
Lord, forgive me for the moments I misrepresent You. Thank You that Your mercy is greater than my failures. Soften my heart, train my responses, and let my life reflect You more and more each day. Use even my mistakes to bring others closer to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
